The Evening Standard asks and answers this question. I agree with much of the article, but the question sounds like it is laying blame on people for going about divorce in the 'wrong' way.  It's easy to say what a good and 'right' divorce might look like; it might be civil, amicable, reasonable and done in a cost effective way through family mediation. Unfortunately, circumstances and events leading up to divorce can make it very difficult for people to put these behaviours into action, especially when you throw powerful emotions into the mix, such as shame, hurt, anger and fear. 

It also takes two to achieve a better divorce, so if one person is determined to make things difficult, the other person can feel forced to either fight or give in which can feel very unfair. 

The best advice I can give to people is to try to deal with the emotional side of separation outside of the legal divorce process; with the help of a therapist or divorce coach. Use family mediation and family lawyers to reach the decisions that need to be made. The advantage of family mediation is there is a bit more room to discuss concerns and barriers to decisions which are not necessarily strictly legal.